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How to Push the Envelope and Make Yourself Change...

The origin of the phrase of pushing the envelope goes like this… In Medieval times Kings paid their knights for tax collection. They were paid in an envelopes made of calf guts dried in mustard seed powder that contained gold. If the Knight did not think he was paid enough he would push the envelope back towards the King, knowing that when he did this he was taking the chance of getting beheaded or receive a higher payment. The chance being taken, hence, defined the term ‘Pushing the Envelope’.

Have there been times when you decided to take a chance and go for a dream, change a behavior or a habit? I’m talking about a really ‘big dream’, an entrenched habit or repetitious behavior. Stalling is no longer an option for you and it’s time to go all out and not look back. Then you go for it! What? There are obstacles? So what are you going to do about them? You set out on the path toward a vision, then you slow down and suddenly you may find yourself asking,” what am I doing?” You know you want to go for this big dream yet; just past the starting line a pause button invisibly gets pressed. All of these thoughts and feelings come to the surface. What is that all about? Part of you wants to rush on with abandon. Other parts less detectable are digging in their heels, causing friction. Moving forward gets thwarted.

Pursuit of anything that requires pushing the envelope in your life is an opportunity for the aspects of you that remain beneath the surface to rise up and cause you to take notice. These are aspects of us that we have suppressed, forgotten about and/or chosen to ignore because they are not comfortable. We may even despise them. These parts can look or feel like keys teachers in our lives such as fathers, mothers, authority figures or anyone who we had difficulty with in our life journey. In essence, when we move out of our comfort zone toward change we face a potential beheading so to speak. We just don’t know it until it shows up. We generally don’t like the shadow parts of ourselves or may not even know they exist. This is where we discover the deeper meaning of what you resist will persist. By wanting to rid yourself of the parts you don’t like or want to hide or just ignore, they only pine for your attention. As I have found from personal experience, that resistance is counter to any peace or alignment necessary to advance through life in wholeness. Do you ever feel at war with yourself like tug-o-war? These aspects of us are not on the same page and it is a cause for mental distress, emotional conflict and even physical disease.

So what do you do when the shadows come to the light? Don’t be scared of them, get to know them! Grab a journal or an electronic device, whatever is handy. If available, good ole paper and pencil is best and begin a conversational dialogue. For anyone new to this it is very simple and it is an act of trusting the wisdom that dwells within you. Ask why it wants to stop you from attaining your dream, changing a habit or behavior? Who does this part act like? What is its purpose? Simply ask, pause and information will come to you. Do not judge or filter what comes up, just listen and write. Within you resides an envelope of golden nuggets, these are the answers to move you from where you are to where you want to go. If you want to embrace and integrate the sabotaging aspects of your life just set out to achieve a big goal, or overcome repetitive behaviors. They will rise up to meet you and barricade your path. We would typically perceive this as a nuisance and find a way around it. Don’t!

I invite you to open up with the intention to discover what you need to know and align with this aspect of you. These hidden aspects need attention and acknowledgement, just like a child. Then once integrated, you will find cooperation because you chose to open the envelope and to discover beyond what you thought possible! The keys to your purpose are found through the shadow. If you’ve felt at war with yourself, life will flow more peacefully and joyfully when you choose to embrace all your aspects. Open up and free yourself!

Shelly is a Breakthrough Life Coach, Hypnotherapist, Teacher, Speaker whose passion is guiding liberation from old consciousness patterning & stuck states to allow you to live in harmony! She can be reached at 330-415-5199 EST or

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